Today

playlist position: 92 - Breaking Dawn Book Two (5) #19
artist: Smashing Pumpkins
album: Siamese Dream
track number: 3/13
year: 1993








Breaking Dawn: Book Three – Chapter20
Everything was so clear.
Sharp. Defined.
The brilliant light overhead was still blinding-bright, and yet I could plainly see the glowing strands of the filaments inside the bulb. I could see each color of the rainbow in the white light, and, at the very edge of the spectrum, an eighth color I had no name for.

_________________________

Today is the greatest day I've ever known
Can't wait for tomorrow
Tomorrow's much too long
I'll burn my eyes out before I get out

I wanted more than life could ever grant me
Bored by the chore of saving face

Today is the greatest day I've ever known
Can't live for tomorrow
I might not have that long
I'll tear my heart out before I get out

Pink ribbon scars that never forget
I tried so hard to cleanse these regrets
My angel wings were bruised and restrained
My belly stings

Today is
Today is
Today is the greatest day

I want to turn you on
I want to turn you on
I want to turn you on
I want to turn you

Today is the greatest
Today is the greatest day
Today is the greatest day that I have ever really known

Someone to Die For

playlist position: 91 - Breaking Dawn Book Two (5) #18
artist: Jimmy Gnecco (feat. Brian May)
album: Music from and Inspired by Spider-Man 2
track number: 13/15
year: 2004
listen on YouTube







Breaking Dawn: Book Two – Chapter18
Everything inside me came undone as I stared at the tiny porcelain face of the half-vampire, half-human baby. All the lines that held me to my life were sliced apart in swift cuts, like clipping the strings to a bunch of balloons. Everything that made me who I was—my love for the dead girl upstairs, my love for my father, my loyalty to my new pack, the love for my other brothers, my hatred for my enemies, my home, my name, my self—disconnected from me in that second—snip, snip, snip—and floated up into space.
I was not left drifting. A new string held me where I was.
Not one string, but a million. Not strings, but steel cables. A million steel cables all tying me to one thing—to the very center of the universe.
I could see that now—how the universe swirled around this one point. I’d never seen the symmetry of the universe before, but now it was plain.
The gravity of the earth no longer tied me to the place where I stood.
It was the baby girl in the blond vampire’s arms that held me here now.
Renesmee.

_________________________

Before you landed
I had a will but didn't know what it could do
You were abandoned
And still you're handing out what you don't wanna lose
You make me drop things
Like all the plans I had for a life without you

Someone to die for
Someone to fall into when the world goes dark
Someone to die for
Someone to tear a hole in this endless night
Someone like you

I'm drunk when sober
The room is spinning
You are what I hold on to
You're taking over
I find that giving in is the best I can do

Someone to die for
Someone to fall into when the world goes dark
Someone to die for
Someone to tear a hole in this endless night
Someone like you

Someone to die for
Someone to die for
Someone to die
Someone
Someone
Someone
Someone to die for
Someone to fall into when the world goes dark
Someone to die for
Someone to tear a hole in this endless night
Someone
Someone like you

Accelerate

playlist position: 90 - Breaking Dawn Book Two (5) #17
artist: R.E.M.
album: Accelerate
track number: 6/17
year: 2008
listen on YouTube







Breaking Dawn: Book Two – Chapter 16
And I was all alone with my hatred and the pain that was so bad it was like being tortured. Like being dragged slowly across a bed of razor blades. Pain so bad you’d take death with a smile just to get away from it.
The heat unlocked my frozen muscles, and I was on my feet.
All three of their heads snapped up, and I watched my pain ripple across Edward’s face as he trespassed in my head again.
“Ahh,” he choked.
I didn’t know what I was doing; I stood there, trembling, ready to bolt for the very first escape that I could think of.
Moving like the strike of a snake, Edward darted to a small end table and ripped something from the drawer there. He tossed it at me, and I caught the object reflexively.
“Go, Jacob. Get away from here.” He didn’t say it harshly—he threw the words at me like they were a life preserver. He was helping me find the escape I was dying for.
The object in my hand was a set of car keys.

_________________________

Sinking fast, the weight chained to my feet
No time to argue with belief
I'm not alone, a thousand others dropping
Faster than me
What put me here?
Nothing to hold on to
Nowhere to brake

Where is the ripcord, the trapdoor, the key?
Where is the cartoon escape-hatch for me?
No time to question the choices I make
I've got to follow another direction (although fall down is much cooler)

The last thing I remember was climbing up the stairs
I threw the window open in challenge and despair
I don't know what I needed
I needed time
I needed to escape
I saw the future turn
Upside-down and hesitate

Where is the ripcord, the trapdoor, the key?
Where is the cartoon escape-hatch for me?
No time to question the choices I make
I've got to follow another direction
Accelerate

The vista I see now is changing
Uncertainty is suffocating
Our hope has never felt so great and
Lit up down
A pounding pulse
To make it go
Make it slow down
Go

Where is the ripcord, the trapdoor, the key?
Where is the cartoon escape-hatch for me?
No time to question the choices I make
I've got to follow another direction.

The city's burning, it's like it's ready to explode
Accelerate to make it slow
Make it go
Accelerate to make it slow
Make it go
I'm incomplete
I'm incomplete
I'm incomplete

Wolf Like Me

playlist position: 89 - Breaking Dawn Book Two (5) #16
artist: TV on the Radio
album: Return to Cookie Mountain
track number: 5/29
year: 2006
watch on YouTube







Breaking Dawn: Book Two – Chapter16
She hesitated for a second, but then, tentatively, she seemed to reach out with her mind and try to see my way. It felt very strange—our minds were more closely linked than they had ever been before, because we both were trying to think together.
Strange, but it helped her. Her teeth cut through the fur and skin of her kill’s shoulder, tearing away a thick slab of streaming flesh. Rather than wince away as her human thoughts wanted to, she let her wolf-self react instinctively. It was kind of a numbing thing, a thoughtless thing. It let her eat in peace.
It was easy for me to do the same. And I was glad I hadn’t forgotten this. This would be my life again soon.
Was Leah going to be a part of that life? A week ago, I would’ve found that idea beyond horrifying. I wouldn’t’ve been able to stand it. But I knew her better now. And, relieved from the constant pain, she wasn’t the same wolf. Not the same girl.

_________________________

Say, say, my playmate
Won't you lay hands on me
Mirror my malady
Transfer my tragedy

Got a curse I cannot lift
Shines when the sunset shifts
When the moon is round and full
Gotta bust that box gotta gut that fish

My mind's aflame

We could jet in a stolen car
But I bet we wouldn't get too far
Before the transformation takes
And bloodlust tanks and crave gets slaked

My mind has changed
My body's frame but, God, I like it
My hearts aflame
My body's strained but, God, I like it

My mind has changed
My body's frame but, God, I like it
My hearts aflame
My body's strained but, God, I like it

Charge me your day rate
I'll turn you out in kind
When the moon is round and full
Gonna teach you tricks that'll blow your mongrel mind
Baby doll, I recognize
You're a hideous thing inside
If ever there were a lucky kind it's
You, you, you, you

I know its strange another way to get to know you
You'll never know unless we go so let me show you
I know its strange another way to get to know you
We've got till noon here comes the moon
So let it show you
Show you now

Dream me oh dreamer
Down to the floor
Open my hands and let them
Weave onto yours

Feel me, completer
Down to my core
Open my heart and let it
Bleed onto yours

Feeding on fever
Down all fours
Show you what all that howl is for

Hey hey my playmate
Let me lay waste to thee
Burned down their hanging trees
It's hot here hot here hot here hot here

Got a curse we cannot lift
Shines when the sunset shifts
There's a cure comes with a kiss
The bite that binds the gift that gives

Now that we got gone for good
Writhing under your riding hood
Tell your gra'ma and your mama too
It's true
We're howling forever

The Sharpest Lives

playlist position: 87 - Breaking Dawn Book Two (5) #14
artist: My Chemical Romance
album: The Black Parade
track number: 4/13
year: 2006
listen on YouTube







Breaking Dawn: Book Two – Chapter15
Two weeks to a day, the days flying by. Her life speeding by in fast-forward. How many days did that give her, if she was counting to forty? Four? It took me a minute to figure out how to swallow.
“You okay?” she asked.
I nodded, not really sure how my voice would come out.
Edward’s face was turned away from us as he listened to my thoughts, but I could see his reflection in the glass wall. He was the burning man again.

_________________________

Well, it rains and it pours
When you're out on your own
If I crash on the couch
Can I sleep in my clothes?
'Cause I've spent the night dancing
I'm drunk, I suppose
If it looks like I'm laughing
I'm really just asking to leave

This alone
You're in time for the show
You're the one that I need
I'm the one that you loathe
You can watch me corrode like a beast in repose
'Cause I love all the poison
Away with the boys in the band

I've really been on a bender and it shows
So why don't you blow me a kiss before she goes?

Give me a shot to remember
And you can take all the pain away from me
A kiss and I will surrender
The sharpest lives are the deadliest to lead
A light to burn all the empires
So bright the sun is ashamed to rise and be
In love with all of these vampires
So you can leave like the sane abandoned me

There's a place in the dark where the animals go
You can take off your skin in the cannibal glow
Juliet loves the beat and the lust it commands
Drop the dagger and lather the blood on your hands, Romeo

I've really been on a bender and it shows
So why don't you blow me a kiss before she goes?

Give me a shot to remember
And you can take all the pain away from me
A kiss and I will surrender
The sharpest lives are the deadliest to lead
A light to burn all the empires
So bright the sun is ashamed to rise and be
In love with all of these vampires
So you can leave like the sane abandoned me

Give me a shot to remember
And you can take all the pain away from me
A kiss and I will surrender
The sharpest lives are the deadliest to lead
A light to burn all the empires
So bright the sun is ashamed to rise and be
In love with all of these vampires
So you can leave like the sane abandoned me

Point of Extinction

playlist position: 88 - Breaking Dawn Book Two (5) #15
artist: Motion City Soundtrack
album: Even If It Kills Me
track number: 11/13
year: 2007
listen on YouTube








Breaking Dawn: Book Two – Chapter 15
“It feels… complete when you’re here, Jacob. Like all my family is together. I mean, I guess that’s what it’s like—I’ve never had a big family before now. It’s nice.” She smiled for half a second. “But it’s just not whole unless you’re here.”
“I’ll never be part of your family, Bella.”
I could have been. I would have been good there. But that was just a distant future that died long before it had a chance to live.
“You’ve always been a part of my family,” she disagreed.
My teeth made a grinding sound. “That’s a crap answer.”
“What’s a good one?”
“How about, ‘Jacob, I get a kick out of your pain.’”
I felt her flinch.
“You’d like that better?” she whispered.
“It’s easier, at least. I could wrap my head around it. I could deal with it.”

_________________________

Are you listening, Javelina?
Every corner of the coast is still clear
All dressed up with some medicine for luck
How I hope that you're still here when I return

Burning bridges is a form of suicide
I saw the fires as the ghost of my life
Passed me by and there's nowhere you can hide
From the lessons or the lies that bind them

I'm so tired
I've had enough
If there's one thing I've learned
You'll always get burned
But you'll never give it up

Can we count on our conversations
to restore us like energon cubes
Made one wish for a permanent kiss
That would echo through these bones like arsenic
I can figure out the point of anything
Just not as quick as I can mess up my life
With all my dreams hooked to hospital machines
I think, "let's try redefining beautiful."

I'm so tired
I've had enough
If there's one thing I've learned
You'll always get burned
But you'll never give it up

This is the best that it will get
(Yeah yeah yeah, give it up, give it up)
This is the best that it will get
(Yeah yeah yeah, give it up)

I can figure out the point of anything
I can figure out the point of anything
I can figure out the point of anything
I can figure out the point of anything
I can figure out the point of anything
I can figure out the point of it

I'm so tired
I've had enough
If there's one thing I've learned
You'll always get burned
But you'll never give it up

I'm so tired
I've had enough
If there's one thing I've learned
You'll always get burned
But you'll never give it up

Twisted Transitor

playlist position: 86 - Breaking Dawn Book Two (5) #13
artist: KoЯn
album: See You on the Other Side
track number: 1/14
year: 2005
watch on YouTube






Breaking Dawn: Book Two – Chapter12 - Leah's perspective
Seth doesn’t want or need your protection. In fact, no one wants you here.
Oooh, ouch, that’s gonna leave a huge mark. Ha, she barked. Tell me who does want me around, and I’m outta here.
So this isn’t about Seth at all, is it?
Of course it is. I’m just pointing out that being unwanted is not a first for me. Not really a motivating factor, if you know what I mean.

_________________________

Hey you, hey you
Devil's little sister
Listening to your
Twisted transistor

Hold it between your legs
Turn it up, turn it up
The wind is coming through
Can't get enough

A lonely life
Where no one understands you
But don't give up
Because the music do

Music do, music do
Music do, music do
Music do, music do

Because the music do
And then it's reaching
Inside you
Forever preaching

"Fuck you too!"
Your scream's a whisper
Hang on you
Twisted transistor

Hey you, hey you
Finally you get it
The world ain't fair
Eat you if you let it

And as your tears fall on
Your breasts, your dress
Vibrations coming through
You're in a mess

A lonely life
Where no one understands you
But don't give up
Because the music do

Music do, music do
Music do, music do
Music do, music do

Because the music do
And then it's reaching
Inside you
Forever preaching

"Fuck you too!"
Your scream's a whisper
Hang on you
Twisted transistor

Music do, music do
Music do, music do
Music do, music do
Music do, music do

Hey you, hey you
This won't hurt a bit
This won't hurt a bit, this won't hurt

Says who, says who
Anesthetize this bitch
Anesthetize this bitch, anesthetize

Just let me be
Between you and me, don't fit

Music do
And then it's reaching
Inside you
Forever preaching

"Fuck you too!"
Your scream's a whisper
Hang on you
Twisted transistor

No I in Threesome

playlist position: 85 - Breaking Dawn Book Two (5) #12
artist: Interpol
album: Our Love to Admire
track number: 2/11
year: 2007
watch on YouTube






Breaking Dawn: Book Two – Chapter10
She knew what I was offering, and she wasn’t going to think twice about it. I’d known that she wouldn’t. But it still stung.
“There isn’t much you wouldn’t do for me, either, is there?” she whispered. “I really don’t know why you bother. I don’t deserve either of you.”
“It makes no difference, though, does it?”
“Not this time.”

_________________________

Through the storms and the light
Babe, you've stood by my side
And life is wine
But there are days in this life
When you see the teeth marks of time
Two lovers divide
Sound meets sound, babe
The echoes they sorround
And know that we need is one thing
Now what is there to allow?
Babe, it's time we give something new a try
Oh, alone we may fight
So, just let us be three
And baby tonight
I see your lips are on fire
And life is wine
Now the windows are open the moon is so bright
There's no one can tell us what love brings, you and I
Sound meets sound, babe
Her echoes they surround
And know that we need is one thing
Now what is there to allow
Babe, it's time we give something new a try
Oh, alone we may fight
So just let us be three, tonight
Through the storms and the light
Baby, you've stood by my side
And life is wine
You feel the sweet breath of time
It's whispering, its truth not mine
There's no I in threesome
And I am all for it
Babe, it's time we give something new a try
Oh, alone we may fight
And feathers bend like trees in the moonlight
Babe, it's time we give something new a try
Oh, alone we may fight
So just let us be three tonight

Earth to Bella, Pt.1

playlist position: 84 - Breaking Dawn Book Two (5) #11
artist: Incubus
album: Light Grenades
track number: 7/13
year: 2006
listen on YouTube







Breaking Dawn: Book Two – Chapter 10
“If you think that imprinting could ever make sense of this insanity...” I struggled for words. “Do you really think that just because I might someday imprint on some stranger it would make this right?” I jabbed a finger toward her swollen body. “Tell me what the point was then, Bella! What was the point of me loving you? What was the point of you loving him? When you die”—the words
were a snarl—“how is that ever right again? What’s the point to all the pain?  Mine, yours, his! You’ll kill him, too, not that I care about that.” She flinched, but  I kept going. “So what was the point of your twisted love story, in the end? If there is any sense, please show me, Bella, because I don’t see it.”

_________________________

Earth to Bella
You think you've got it all figured in
Earth to Bella
Everything you know is wrong
Well, almost

Earth to Bella
I've seen when you are not listening
I bear the burden of being the voice that lets you know
We all grow old
And before you swim you gotta be okay to sink

Earth to Bella
The world can be an unfriendly place
So hold your head up
And do your best to save some face
It's not so hard
Just undo yourself and see a second sun ascend

I'm okay to sink, okay to sink
Im okay to sink, okay to sink

What It Takes

playlist position: 83 - Breaking Dawn Book Two (5) #10

artist: Aerosmith
album: Pump
track number: 10/10
year: 1989
watch on YouTube







Breaking Dawn: Book Two – Chapter 9
I saw her at the same moment that I caught her scent.
Her warm, clean, human scent.
Bella was half-hidden behind the arm of the sofa, curled up in a loose fetal position, her arms wrapped around her knees. For a long second I could see nothing except that she was still the Bella that I loved, her skin still a soft, pale peach, her eyes still the same chocolate brown. My heart thudded a strange, broken meter, and I wondered if this was just some lying dream that I was about to wake up from.

_________________________

There goes my old girlfriend
There's another diamond ring
And, uh, all those late night promises
I guess they don't mean a thing
So baby, what's the story?
Did you find another man?
Is it easy to sleep in the bed that we made?
When you don't look back I guess the feelings start to fade away
I used to feel your fire but now it's cold inside
And you're back on the street like you didn't miss a beat, yeah

Tell me what it takes to let you go
Tell me how the pain's supposed to go
Tell me how it is that you can sleep in the night
Without thinking you lost everything that was good in your life
To the toss of the dice
Tell me what it takes to let you go

Yeah
Girl, before I met you I was F.I.N.E. Fine
But your love made me a prisoner
Yeah, my heart's been doing time
You spent me up like money
Then you hung me out to dry
It was easy to keep all your lies in disguise
'Cause you had me in deep with the devil in your eyes

Tell me what it takes to let you go
Tell me how the pain's supposed to go
Tell me how it is that you can sleep in the night
Without thinking you lost everything that was good in your life
To the toss of the dice
Tell me what it takes to let you go

Guitar

Tell me that you're happy that you're on your own
Yeah, yeah, yeah
Tell me that it's better when you're all alone
Tell me that your body doesn't miss my touch
Tell me that my lovin' didn't mean that much
Tell me you ain't dyin' when you're cryin' for me

Tell me what it takes to let you go
Tell me how the pain's supposed to go
Tell me how it is that you can sleep in the night
Without thinking you lost everything that was good in your life
To the toss of the dice
Tell me what it takes to let you go

Tell me what it takes to let you go
Tell me how the pain's supposed to go
Tell me how it is that you can sleep in the night
Without thinking you lost everything that was good in your life
To the toss of the dice
Tell me who's to blame for thinkin' twice
No, no, no, no
'Cause I don't wanna burn in paradise
Ooh
Let go, let go, let go,
Let it go, let it go, let it go, let it go, let it go,
Let it go, let it go, let it go,
Let it go, let it go, let it go, let it go, let it go
I don't wanna burn, I don't wanna burn

Down In It

playlist position: 82 - Breaking Dawn: Book One (4) #9

                         121 - Midnight Sun (1.5) #3

artist: Nine Inch Nails
album: Pretty Hate Machine
track number: 3/11
year: 1989
watch on YouTube







Breaking Dawn: Book One – Chapter 8 - Jacob's perspective
I wondered—would a bullet through my temple actually kill me or just leave a really big mess for me to clean up?
I threw myself down on the bed. I was tired—hadn’t slept since my last patrol—but I knew I wasn’t going to sleep. My head was too crazy. The thoughts bounced around inside my skull like a disoriented swarm of bees. Noisy. Now and then they stung. Must be hornets, not bees. Bees died after one sting. And the same thoughts were stinging me again and again.

_________________________

Wimp
Wimp

Kinda like a cloud I was up way up in the sky
And I was feeling some feelings you wouldn't believe
Sometimes I don't believe them myself
And I decided I was never coming down

Just then a tiny little dot caught my eye
It was just about too small to see
But I watched it way too long
It was pulling down

I was up above it
I was up above it
I was up above it
I was up above it
Now I'm down in it

Shut up
So what what does it matter now?
I was swimming in the hate
Now I crawl on the ground
And everything I never liked about you is kind of seeping into me
I try to laugh about it now
But isn't it funny how everything works out?
I guess the jokes on me, she said

I was up above it
I was up above it
I was up above it
I was up above it
Now I'm down in it

I used to be so big and strong
I used to know my right from wrong
I used to never be afraid
I used to be somebody

I used to have something inside
Now just this hole it's open wide
I used to want it all
I used to be somebody

I'll cross my heart and hope to die
But the needle's already in my eye
And all the world's weight is on my back
And I don't even know why
And what I used to think was me is just a fading memory
I looked him right in the eye and said goodbye

I was up above it
I was up above it
I was up above it
I was up above it
Now I'm down in it

Rain, rain, go away
Rain, rain, go away
Rain, rain, go away
Come again some other day

I was up above it
I was up above it
I was up above it
I was up above it
Now I'm down in it

Na na na na na na na na